September 27, 2021

34 Phlebotomy Memes That Will Make You Laugh Out Loud

34 Phlebotomy Memes That Will Make You Laugh Out Loud

Drawing blood from patients all day can be stressful! This is why it is important to find hilarity wherever possible, especially when you work as a phlebotomist.

These memes will make you laugh and help you find comedy in the daily grind in a way that only phlebotomists can understand. Who knows, maybe your new sense of humor will rub off on your patients and make sticking people with needles all day less stressful for everyone.

30+ Phlebotomy Memes Every Phlebotomist Needs to See

#1. Tattoos

When your patient has physical proof that they can handle needles, but refuses to have their blood drawn out of sheer terror. 


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#2.  Beautiful stranger veins

When you see veins so beautiful you can’t help but stare and offer a compliment.

Via Cute766, Image source 

#3. Phlebotomy is sexy

If Ryan Gosling was taking your blood, would you still be mad?


#4. The bigger the challenge, the better

Watch me nail this blood draw with my eyes closed.


#5. Brave young souls

When your patient is this cute, how can you say no?

Via Facebook

#6. The first time you recognize your power

“So, you are going to cause me pain and then charge me for your services?” - Every patient

Via Quickmeme

#7. When you get caught mapping out your best stick opportunity before making eye contact

I have a passion for veins, what can I say?

Via CDN 

#8. When the lab is calling, and you know why

Say it isn't’ so!


#9. She loves me

Sometimes all it takes is a little compliment to make things move quickly.


#10. It's my job

Good thing you told me or I would have never figured that out!

Via Me.Me 

#11. When you realize your job has created new neural pathways

I silently whisper WTF to myself at least 7 times a day.


#12. When you are so intrigued you can’t stop staring

I never believed in love at first sight, until now.

#13. When your patient is taking anticoagulants

 Can you not hold me accountable for the inevitable?

#14. When orders come in right after you finish collecting specimens on the unit

Can’t we just all be on the same team?

#15. When your patients make fun of you

How would you like it if I started calling you names?

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#16. When you see your non-compliant patient for the 5th time

Remind me why you are in the hospital for COPD management again?

#17. When you think the nurse lies because they are busy and you get to be the jerk

What is the point of this PICC if you can’t use it?

#18. When your Sunday is everybody else's Friday

But I get to run my errands at noon on a Tuesday when you all are working. You must envy my position.

#19. Trying to articulate to your patient that now is not a good time to yell at you

I’m just trying to help you out.

#20. Trying to explain your real job to the lay people

But I’m basically a hero.

#21. When administration questions you about why you are so behind

There is a simple solution to this problem folks.

#22. When you become the king

I knew I was the best, and now everyone knows it.

#23. When you remind your patient that by drawing blood for analysis, you keep them alive to see another day

Let's not miss out on the big picture.

#24. When love deceives you

I thought we were in this together?

#25. When you have no choice but to brag with your eyes

Don’t ever question my skills.

#26. When it’s your fourth time drawing blood on the same patient 

I don’t know how to better explain that I know what I’m doing.

#27. When your patient has awesome veins but doesn’t know it

We have so many different size butterflies around here. Just don’t watch me.

#28. When your patient can only handle pain if it makes them look cool

If you can handle 13 ear piercings this will be a breeze.

#29. Phlebotomists on a date

I see so much potential here.

#30. When you feel like the biggest failure

I need to take the rest of the day off for my mental health.

#31. When you can’t guarantee success on the first try

Wish me luck!

#32. Phlebotomist humor

That was funny, right?

#33. When a phlebotomist acknowledges they are #1

“I would like to thank everyone for believing in me, it is because of you that I had the strength to fight on.”

#34. Why does everyone keep referring to me as a vampire?

It's not like I actually drink your blood as nourishment for my survival.

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